december + january wrap-up, favourites and others 🌨

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Dear reader,

I know that I haven’t been the most consistent and active blogger. What made it worse was that my computer has been broken while I was at the hospital this summer. Ever since it has been harder to blog, even though I really wanted to. Well, I am happy to say that I am now back and that I have a brand new computer. I can now finally blog at home and at peace, and I have so many ideas that I can’t wait to share with you all.

As I disappeared for a while I decided to start my comeback with a wrap-up for the months of both December and January. I hope that it’s okay with you all. I missed you and am so happy to be back!

Without further ado, let’s jump into my December and January wrap-up!

Continue reading december + january wrap-up, favourites and others 🌨

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October wrap-up, favourites and other 🍂

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Dear reader,

A few weeks ago I told you I was taking a short break to focus on my exams and to relax a bit. This break ended up lasting quite a few more weeks. I would have blogged but as I don’t have a computer anymore (I am saving money to buy myself a new one) I can’t blog from home and have to wait for my lunch breaks at work, which means that I’m not always in the mood for it. Anyhow, this time I pushed myself to sit down and to write my October wrap-up as I did many things this month and need to sort it all out.

So without further ado, let’s jump right into what my October was made of! 🍂

Continue reading October wrap-up, favourites and other 🍂

September wrap-up, favourites and other

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Dear reader,

September has been a tough month: I felt extremely low, got into a reading slump, moved out from our house to a new appartment, am currently a bit sick but have no time to rest and my suicidal thoughts came back, so I have now new meds and tons of appoitments to the hospital to get better. I’m still proud of me because I didn’t stop trying to get better no matter what and here I am today, ready to welcome my favourite month of the year: October. 🎃🍂🌧

October means my birthday, my best friend’s birthday, Halloween 👻 and the official return of the autumnal weather, but this year it also means going back to Disneyland Paris, flying to London for a very bookish reason which I can’t wait to tell you all about (it’s very important and is actually the proof that my work is now aknowledged worldwide speaking), band rehearsals, going to le Parc Astérix and the Paris Comic Con, participating in Victober, going to a pumpkin patch and to the French premiere of Bohemian Rhapsody. I also happen to have extremely important exams on my birthday, but I should be able to survive and do it all.

Before even starting to plan October, let’s recap all the things that happened to me during September.

Continue reading September wrap-up, favourites and other

August wrap-up, favourites and other

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Dear reader,

I know that once again, I disappeared from my blog. For once, I do have an explanation for it: I finished my thesis! At the beggining of the summer I really thought that I could do it all: read, blog and write my thesis. Well, I was wrong and I had to take two weeks of vacations to work on it properly. It was hard, there were moments I thought I couldn’t do it but as it was my main goal for the month I pushed myself and did it. As I am writing this I only have to add some corrections and I’ll be able to hand it back in a week.

But since we are not here to only talk about my thesis, let’s go back to August and see what I read and loved!

Continue reading August wrap-up, favourites and other

July wrap-up, favourites and other

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Dear reader,

Surprisingly, July has been a great month. It had its down times, I am still grieving but I also did a lot of things and had so much fun. I started reading again, I finally worked a lot on my thesis and am actually proud of what I’m doing and started going out again, well not partying but seeing my friends, going to the movies and to Disneyland. I also went back to London during July and went to YALC, and it was all a dream. I am very proud of all the progress I made because I was still sad and anxious but I can feel myself changing and improving nonetheless.

Without further ado, let’s go back to July and see what I read and loved!

Continue reading July wrap-up, favourites and other

June wrap-up, favourites and other

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Dear reader,

June has been a very weird month. I spent three weeks at the hospital for my eating disorder, and they wanted to keep me for another one because I wasn’t getting better but I decided to go out anyway. I also lost my grand-mother while I was there, who I used to see every day and who I loved more than anything, and it was all a nightmare. However, I am still determined to get better and to take care of myself. I have tons of new ideas for this blog and I have to say that I missed blogging a lot while I was away!

July is supposed to be a better month as I am leaving for London on the 26th for YALC, an English book fair. I just can’t wait to go back to this city which I adore and which always makes me feel at home. Despite all the bad things that have happened, I’m really trying to make the most of the second part of 2018.

But anyway, let’s wrap-up June!

Continue reading June wrap-up, favourites and other

May wrap-up, favourites and other

tw// suicide + depression

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Dear reader,

Look at me posting my May wrap-up perfectly on time this time. Honestly, May has been a roller-coaster. You may have noticed or not, but 2018 has been… Well, hell for me. It started well but ever since February, the anxiety and depression consumed me once again and I fall back into everything that I once was, this extremely sad and angry girl who couldn’t spend a day without getting hurt. May has been… worse than all of that. It hasn’t been as bad as it could have been, but it was honestly awful to live in my head. I was exhausted and had no will to get out of bed. I was angry all the time, always at something or at someone, and I could feel the pain inside my chest. I was sad and couldn’t even put myself to do something to cheer me up. I started complaining on the Internet again, I got mad at some of my friends, I stopped going out, watching tv shows, reading, writing, working on my Instagram and blog. I then went to Vienna with my school, which terrified me. I woke up and sobbed for 30 minutes because of how stressed and sad I was. I’d lie if I said I didn’t think about death those past few weeks, those past few months…

But then I came back, and something changed. While in Vienna, I took some risks, went out alone, talked to other people than my friends, went to night club, expressed my feelings and more. It really did something to me. I came home ready to get better, and I started to do everything in order to succeed. Just like after my suicidal attempt when I was 18, it felt like a slap in my face and I started to see the world clearer. As if I was drowning the entire time and that I was finally getting my head out of the water. I’m not saying I am healed and I don’t want to say that I feel amazing (even though I do, a little bit), but I know that I survived the first half of 2018 and that the second one will be incredible. I am ready to go to the hospital in a few days to get the keys to deal with my eating disorder, ready to push myself to enjoy life, ready to start living my adult life as soon as I’ll be done with master degree in a few months and to simply be happy.

Continue reading May wrap-up, favourites and other